As we acclimatise to the unprecedented lockdowns in our own homes and more and more families keep their children at home too, I thought it would be worthwhile to add some more detail to my previous post about how to talk about the Covid-19 emergency to our kids.
I did some web research and found some great information on the Developing Minds website on this topic. Developing Minds is an Adelaide based group of psychologists who work with children of all abilities to help overcome obstacles and challenging life events.
Dr. Kirrilie Smout, Director at Developing Minds, has listed some questions and some thoughtful responses to help you answer your child’s questions in a time of national emergency. I will just provide a few examples but you can use the general framework to answer all sorts of questions in a mindful way that doesn’t add to our child’s anxiety.
For starters, Dr Kirrile lists four general principles to use in answering your kid’s questions.
Try to ask a question or two before you respond to a child’s concerns
Express care and sympathy
Answer with a matter of fact, calm and confident voice and facial expression
It’s ok to put some limits on the time you spend talking about it.
Question 1. I’m worried that school will close
Possible extra questions to ask
What would be the worst thing about that?
Is there anything you are worried will happen if the school closes?
Is there anything in particular that would make things better for you if school did close?
Do you think there would be anything positive about having some time away from school for a while?
Possible things to say
I understand you being worried about that, everyone is having times when they feel a bit worried at the moment
For now, it looks like schools (in SA) will stay open
If your school does close then you will be able to do some learning with us at home
These are the other kinds of things we will do if school is closed
It won’t be forever, just a little while.
Question 2. I’m worried we won’t be able to get enough food
Possible extra questions to ask
Who told you/how did you hear that we might not be able to get enough food?
Are there any particular foods you are worried about?
Possible things to say
The world has plenty of food for everyone. It’s just that when people are worried, they sometimes buy more food than they need
Soon the shops may be allowed to open for longer hours which will help everyone to take it in turns to buy the food they need
Just because some shops don’t have very much food on one day – there are other shops with more food on other days.
Question 3. I’m worried I will get sick with Coronavirus
Possible extra questions to ask
What makes you worried about that?
What would be the worst thing about that happening?
Is there anything else you are worried about in getting sick?
Are there any times of a day/situations you are thinking about this?
Possible things to say
This is what happens to most people who get Coronavirus: they feel a bit hot, they have a cough, they feel tired and sometimes they have a sore body. This lasts for a few days or a week and then they are completely better. It’s like a cold or a mild flu. It is very unlikely to hurt you too much, and you will just lie in bed and watch TV/read for a little while.
Young people are much less likely to get very sick from Coronavirus than much older people.
There are a small number of young people who do get a bit more sick and it takes them a bit longer to get better. We have excellent doctors and nurses who can help any kids or teens feel better if they do get quite sick.
Question 4.
I’m worried my grandparents will get sick and die
Possible extra questions to ask
What makes you worried about this?
Are there any times of day/situations you are thinking about this?
Possible things to say
Grandpa/Nanna is pretty healthy.
Grandpa/Nanna is doing lots of things to stay healthy at the moment – for example they are…
We have excellent doctors and nurses who can help people feel better if they do get quite sick.
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